


Goddamnit

by bleeeeeeep



Category: Captain America - All Media Types
Genre: Anal Sex, Blow Jobs, Dirty Thoughts, Dubious Consent, M/M, Masturbation, Maybe OOC, Pizza, Steve has no problems with foul language, nanogenarians, silliness, wet dreams
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-06
Updated: 2017-05-22
Packaged: 2018-09-28 14:42:39
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 4,358
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10118765
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bleeeeeeep/pseuds/bleeeeeeep
Summary: Steve's dreams find themselves invaded until he just can't take it anymore.Or where Steve gets his best friend back. And it's like nothing's changed between them since before Bucky fell.  Aside from the mysterious stranger riding his cock while he's sleeping, of course.





	1. Surprise

**Author's Note:**

> My first one in this fandom! I hope you like it.

           White-hot velvet around his cock, so tight it almost hurts.  But it's good.  Jesus fucking Christ, it's good.  So good.  Up and down, up and down, almost all the way up and all the way down.  Slick, smooth, and slow.  Almost torturously slow.  He's practically dizzy, helplessly enthralled, but it's good.  So fucking good. His hands are tied to the headboard. He could break the rope if he wanted to. There’s a cock attached to the delectable ass, gliding against the precum pooled on his stomach. Moans ringing in his ears. It’s all so good he can hardly stand it.

            He’s about to come. He swears he is. And then…

“BUZZ. BUZZ. BUZZ. GET UP YOU LAZY MOTHERFUCKER.”

            Fucking alarm clock.   His poor erection deflates like a balloon somebody punctured a tiny hole in. Instead of flying around hopelessly, it just flops down between his legs as he rolls over to shut the highly offensive noise off.

            “Goddamnit,” Steve mutters. He swings his legs over the side of the bed and makes his way to the bathroom to pee, brush his teeth, and shower before meeting the rest of the Avengers for breakfast.

            His stomach grumbles as he’s rinsing suds out of his hair. Apparently, sex dreams make one hungry. He finishes his shower as quickly and efficiently as he can manage, dries off, and tugs a pair of clean boxers, sweats, and a t-shirt on before making his way to the kitchen.

            On the way, he runs into Clint. Literally. It shakes him out of his pre-coffee stupor.

            “Shit, sorry, Clint! Wasn’t paying attention to where I was going.”

            Clint just chuckles. “It’s fine. Saved me the trouble of having to find you. Tony sent me. He says we have a surprise for you this morning.”

            “Please don't tell me it’s a blow up doll,” Steve grumbles. Last Monday, there was a fleshlight waiting for him at his seat. The Monday before that was a porn magazine. Before that was a business card with an appointment for a “happy ending” massage that he politely declined. For the past three weeks, Tony Stark has not-so-subtly been hinting at making a change in his non-existent sex life. But it’s too early to be thinking about this.

            They walk towards the scent of scrambled eggs, French toast, bacon, sausage, and most importantly, coffee. Steve likes his black and cold. Like his soul before caffeine has hit his blood stream.

            As it turns out, the surprise is not a blow up doll. When Clint and Steve arrive at the dining table, Tony clears his throat with an obnoxious “Ahem.”

Steve looks up, ready to roll his eyes when he sees what the surprise is. It’s a Bucky. Bucky. His Bucky. He can feel his eyes light up and his mouth forming the biggest smile he’s smiled in a long time as he rushes over, barefoot and hungry to give his best friend a hug that would crush anybody else’s ribs.

            Nobody says a thing. Not even Tony. Bucky hugs back just as tightly as they breathe against each other as if nothing happened. After a minute (in Steve’s mind, ten in real time), Steve looks up and whispers, “I missed you.”

            The happy, almost teary look in Bucky’s eyes says the same.

            Nobody else has a single word to throw out before they eat. They are just a bunch of misfit superheroes, a god, and two super-soldiers having breakfast. And like an unspoken agreement, everybody decides to leave the past in the past.

            Time would probably be better spent teaching Thor, Steve, and Bucky how to use modern technology anyway. First and foremost, they start with television. It’s only fair that they learn how to operate a modern one, considering how much time the Avengers have spent on the news.

            “So which button do I use to turn it on again?” Bucky asks for the third time. Steve knows he’s just trolling, but nobody else has to know that.

            “For the love of technology!” Tony throws his arms up in exasperation and storms out of the room.

            Natasha shoots him a dirty look. “You’re doing this on purpose, James.” She leaves too.

            Clint, Bruce, and Sam remain. Thor is listening with genuine curiosity. Midgard things are confusing! “Please tell us again,” he requests.

            It’s Clint who gets a funny glint in his eye and a small smirk on his face. “It’s the button with the circle and a stick going through part of it. Looks kind of like an ass somebody’s got a cock up. “

            Bruce and Sam shake their heads and walk away. Thor nods, “Thank you for your more than adequate, albeit strangely worded explanation.” He retires to his room to practice the use of said button.

            Clint smirks again and leaves to report to Natasha what he’s done. Bucky and Steve are left on the couch. All alone. Bucky turns to Steve, “That was a fun lesson, right?”

            Steve, for some reason, turns redder than a ripe tomato and stammers, “I think I need a nap.” What he really needs is a cold shower because Clint’s words brought his early morning dreams to mind, but his best friend doesn’t need to know that.

            “Huh,” Bucky says to himself and turns the TV on. He even knows how to change channels, but that can be his own little secret for now.


	2. Doom. Version 2.0

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pizza and doom. Please don't hate me.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you all enjoy this!

            Steve lied to himself. The cold shower most certainly did not happen. For several reasons, some he has no wish to list. However, to quell the curiosity of whomever may be reading… One – he did not need his nipples to be harder than they already were. Two – cold showers suck. He knows that from life during the 20th century. Three – masturbation is healthy and fuck, if he doesn’t try to live a healthy life.

            He gives in. Steven Grant Rogers allows borderline scalding jets of water spray his back as he plays with his foreskin. It’ll be like his own version of a massage with a happy ending. He makes twisting circles around his cock with the thumb and index finger of his right hand, which is just wet enough to resemble a hot tongue spiraling around him. Such a tease. He leans his forehead against the wall and grips himself tighter, moving back and forth from the base to the tip. If he tries really hard, he can imagine a pretty mouth stretched wide, bobbing. So wet. So hot. So good. His world goes white hot like his dream this morning and his release finds itself rinsed down the drain.

            “Goddamnit,” he mumbles and finishes his shower.

            Bucky smiles to himself in front of the television, despite the not-very-funny talking sponge and his starfish friend. Clint, who decided to return to the living room, wonders why, but he doesn’t worry. Time will tell.

            About an hour and a half later, Steve stumbles in, his face still flushed from the shower or from what he did in said shower. His stomach grumbles before he has a change to get a greeting out, so he smiles sheepishly, “Would either of you be up for ordering some pizza?”

            Clint, being Clint, looks at him likes he’s gone insane and goes, “Was that even a question?”

            Bucky grins and hands the phone to Clint. He orders seven with extra cheese because while he’s dialing, Thor walks in and needs to be shown what mortals consider food of the gods. Then Natasha comes in and she’d kill anybody if they ever called her out on it, but she can never turn down a good slice or five. Can’t leave Tony out when it’s his tower they’re having said pizza delivered to. Bruce likes pizza too. Seven makes sense. Seven extra cheesy pizzas and three dozen garlic knots.

            “While we wait for sustenance, would somebody be so kind as to demonstrate how to operate this modern device again?” Thor asks.

            Bucky’s grin turns a little evil. He’s always been a little shit, looking for any chance to be a stupidly cute pain in the ass, Steve remembers fondly.

            “Pretty please, Tony?” Bucky also does the cutest little pout. It makes Steve snort and Tony look like he’s going to throw up.

            “Yeah, yeah, grandpa, just stop making that face,” Stark can’t help rolling his eyes or smiling. He picks up the remote control and does his best impression of a kindergarten teacher. “Can everybody see the arrows on the remote control?”

            Steve squints, “Oh bring it closer please, Mr. Stark?” He finds his own voice slightly nauseating. Bucky snickers.

            Thor, the well-behaved one of three, nods. One would have thought that Jane had taught him some things about life on Earth.

            Even Natasha has to roll her eyes. Clint has his glued to the square sponge who talks. Tony sighs, exasperatedly, and takes pity on the nonagenarian, “These arrows.” He points to the volume and channel controls.

            “Ohhhhh. Okay. What are they?” Steve asks, despite being able to read.

            “Well, the one that has ‘volume’ written between the up and down buttons is for how loud or soft you want the TV to be and the other one that has ‘channel’ printed between the up and down arrows is for controlling what you want to watch.”

            Steve, Bucky, and Thor nod in unison. “Ohhhhh.” Two of them are just a tiny bit sarcastic.

            “Now you get to practice. Who wants to go first?” Thor’s hand shoots up.

            The next half hour gets spent in front of the speedy picture device with every volume between soft whispers and Thor when he’s shouting during a battle. Everybody has to have a turn, after all. They haven’t even started on the channels yet.

            _Good thing operating the TV has nothing to do with saving the world,_ Tony thinks. But, it’s Natasha who says, “Thank fuck,” when security calls up to announce the arrival of pizza.

            When the pizza makes his way upstairs after a good wait because of a certain star-struck delivery boy, Bucky and Steve sit in a corner of the living room with two whole pies. It’s almost nostalgic, save for the fact that they were not really able to afford or eat this much back then.

            Nevertheless, they sit on the floor, cross-legged, with a slice in each of their right hands, smiling at each other. Nobody else exists in their little bubble. Bucky looks Steve in the eye and through his smile, he says, “I missed this. Eating with you.”

            Steve smiles back, shyly, and nods as if to say, “I missed this, too.”

            Attention is then turned to their pizzas. Steve does not come to the surface (or look up from his slice) for air until he’s working on the crust. That’s when he notices. Those fucking red lips (despite being partially covered in tomato sauce.)

            His sub-conscience is not even surprised when he starts to choke. _God-fucking-damnit._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> kudos and comments make me happy :D (please and thank you, but only if you like this work so far, of course.)


	3. Lucky for Bucky

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Poor Steve. I'm sorry, Steve.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please don't hate me. And sorry it's taken me this long to update.

            Tony has never seen Steve’s face get this red. Not even when he sent the first _special_ present. Jesus Christ, he’s like the color of a sundried tomato that isn’t actually… dry. Nope. He’s just choking. Steve’s choking. Shit, he’s choking.

            Clint’s the one who thinks to perform the Heimlich maneuver on Captain America. He may not be as big or as strong, but he does know basic first aid.   Bucky’s still in front of Steve while Clint is trying to get that pizza dislodged from his throat.

            It’s almost out. Clint can feel it. Three, two, … oh fuck. The projectile vomit you thought you only saw in movies happens. It sprays. All over Bucky. Lucky Bucky. Bucky’s too in shock to move as it hits him in the chin and part of his neck. And it drips, too. Right down the front of his t-shirt.

            Bucky just grins. “How delicious,” he says. Steve looks mortified enough for the both of them. “You always were good about sharing, Stevie.”

            Bruce is the first one to crack up. That makes Thor start. It’s Thor’s charmingly hearty chuckle that gets Tony started. Before they know it, the whole room is practically shaking with laughter. Even the perpetrator.

            Steve feels like he needs another shower. His teeth would also appreciate a good brush. He turns back to look around the room before his escape. Bucky catches his eye and the bastard, the bastard winks. He fucking winks, with a surprising lack of regard for the mess.

            The tomato color finds its way back to Steve’s face. Dear God. Steven Grant Rogers has never been one to back down from a fight. Fortunately, this isn’t a fight. This is Bucky being a little shit. Steve scurries away.

            He cleans up and by the time he comes back, Bucky has left to clean up. Steve sees it as an opportunity to wolf down more pizza before Bucky’s cheekiness makes him choke again. Choking on… other things sounds a lot more fun, but we won’t go there, right now. Especially after Steve has just gotten himself cleaned up.

            Pizza tastes a lot better when Steve is not choking or throwing up. Nobody says anything while he stuffs his face. Nope. In the ten minutes it takes him to finish the remainder of his pizza, Steve hears nothing but the sound of his own chewing. Everything else around him is just white noise. Blissful silence.

            Again, a silent pact is made. This one is to never mention the incident of pizza-upchuck ever again.

Bucky nods to himself in agreement whilst he showers. He gets himself squeaky clean. Everywhere.

When he comes out of his new room, it seems that the lesson on using the remote control has been resumed.  It makes him wonder when the vein popping out of Tony’s forehead is going to burst.

Really, he would give Tony a break, but… how could anybody be so gullible as to believe that he and Steve are unaware of how to operate a television? Steve has been awake for a few years now and it’s not like he hasn’t had any downtime to learn about technology. And Bucky… well… he wasn’t always… asleep.

Bucky figures that anybody gullible enough to believe that deserves the irritation of having to “teach” them.

“You guys started the lesson without me?!” he whines. “Now I don’t know what’s going on!”

Tony facepalms and storms out as Bucky makes his way to the couch and plops down next to Steve. “More of the square sponge with a starfish for a friend?” he asks with a grin.

Steve nods. Thor looks curious. Clint giggles through his bite of pizza. Natasha smiles and leaves.

They watch until it is time for dinner. Tony decided to stop fuming at some point and watch with them. Nobody feels like cooking so they sift through the takeout menus Tony has acquired over the years. For somebody who is very, very into technology, he is awful fond of keeping paper copies of menus.

No pizza. “No pizza,” Steve declares, uneager to have a repeat of what happened during lunch.

“I think I’d like something spicy,” Thor pipes in. “Perhaps some Southeast Asian food that appears quite popular amongst Midgardians?”

Bucky nods in agreement.

“I could go for some chicken satay,” Clint says.

Natasha and Bruce nod too.

Steve shrugs. He does not know what chicken satay is, but he hopes it won’t make him think of Bucky performing oral sex.

“Southeast Asian food, it is!” Tony gives their little circle a thumbs-up before he goes to call in their order.

It arrives and before Steve knows it Bucky is wolfing down the meal. Chicken satay is meat. On a stick. Oh goodness.

He does his best to finish the meal of meat on a stick, various stir-fried noodles, and some delicious vegetables he’s never tried before. Water spinach, he believes it’s called.

He does not look at Bucky while he eats. He doesn’t really look at anybody at all. He cleans his plate and he goes to bed.

Bucky’s devilish smile appears as he watches Steve leave the room, quite obviously flustered. He eats and he waits. He watches more television as he waits. He waits until midnight. Steve is definitely asleep. Lucky for Bucky, he sleeps like a rock.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really really hope you guys don't hate me.
> 
> Thanks for reading!


	4. Like a dream

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Really very lucky for Bucky.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> dirty things, including a bit of somnophilia.

Lucky for Bucky, Steve also sleeps nude, with a nightlight on. Also with nothing but a thin blanket over his fantastically god-like body. He used to sleep that way in the summers before the serum as well.

He tiptoes in without a sound. It’s one skill from his former job that he is actually quite grateful for in this very moment.

He strips once he gets to the foot of the bed. His t-shirt goes first. Then his jeans and his underwear (which may or may not be somewhat damp) go together. His metal arm brushes against his skin as he lowers his boxers. That slight chill is perfect.

Goodness, it feels good to be naked. It’ll feel even better once he’s fucking himself on that cock keeping the blanket tented. The plug is pleasantly thick, but the behemoth jutting out from his best friend’s body is even better. He won’t even need to try to hit all of the right spots.

He pulls the blanket off swiftly, watching Steve’s cock move back and forth like a metronome, just barely slapping that washboard made of muscle.

The bed sinks in as Bucky climbs on the bed, hovering over a sleeping Captain America. He uses his metal arm to pull the plug out. Christ, his hole is gaping. It needs to be filled, so badly. He needs to be filled.

Bucky bites his bottom lip to keep himself from moaning the moment the head of that cock breaches his hole. He sinks down gently, slowly adjusting to the (utmost welcome) intrusion. It’s been so long since he’s felt this full. He closes his eyes, embracing the sensation.

Once he gets half way down, large, warm hands land on his hips. “Bucky?” Steve murmurs sleepily.

He throws his head back and moans.

Steve doesn’t need any more of an invitation to roll Bucky on his back and start thrusting slow and deep. White-hot, like a goddamn dream. For all he knows, it is a dream.

“Harder, please. Please, Stevie, please,” Bucky begs. “Pretty, pretty please.”

Steve has never felt so inclined to give Bucky what he wants. He rolls his hips like a stripper in that movie Darcy showed them, Magic Mike. Bucky looks beautiful underneath him, eyes shut. He’s always had such a gorgeous neck too.

All Steve wants to do is mark him up. He leans down and runs his front teeth over the skin just below that perfect jaw. He licks and nibbles his way downwards, sucking bruises as he pleases.

“Fuck me, please,” Bucky pleads between the sweetest _oh’s_ and _ah’s._ Steve thrusts harder. Anything for the dream writhing between him and the bed.

Steve bites down when he reaches Bucky’s right shoulder and that’s it for Bucky.

He comes, untouched, warm and sticky between their torsos. His body goes taut, back arching stunningly, automatically clenching around the cock still thrusting inside of him.

Steve isn’t going to last much longer.

“Fill me up, baby. Please,” is all it takes. He comes and comes inside that hot, silky little hole Bucky’s had prepared for him since lunch. A kiss on the forehead shakes him out of post-orgasmic bliss.

Steve pulls out of Bucky and rolls to the left of him. Just before he falls asleep, he mumbles, “Best dream ever.”

Bucky has never, in this century, been so determined to stay by his side until he wakes up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you for reading!
> 
> please don't hate me.


	5. Five

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steve is Steve. And Bucky is kind of a little shit.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the end!

Steve wakes up at the crack of dawn.

Steve tries to rub the sleep out of his eyes.

A shiny metal arm is the first thing Steve sees upon opening his eyes.

“Goddamnit,” Steve mumbles as he rolls off the bed in shock.

Steven Grant Rogers would be almost positive that he was still asleep if falling off the bed had not hurt so much.

But it hurts a lot, so yes, Steve is awake.

Things Steve knows is true: he is awake and on the floor and there is one James Buchanan Barnes in his bed.

Things Steve is guessing happened: the very thorough fucking he provided his best friend with last night was not a dream.

Things Steve is asking himself: why he is still lying on the floor.

Steve climbs back to bed and decides that a bit of snuggling with his best friend is in order. He is not awake enough to really care about the dried “stuff” on either of them.

Shortly after he presses his chest to Bucky’s back and throws his arm over Bucky’s waist, James Buchanan Barnes finds himself awake with the face of one blonde-haired super soldier buried in the nape of his neck. The lips attached to said face are pressing soft, sleepy kisses to his skin and he cannot help moaning.

“Morning, baby doll,” Steve mumbles against his shoulder. “I see you came to surprise me last night. Didn’t bother waking me up, did you? Didn’t clean us up afterwards either.”

Bucky thinks Steve will forgive him if he snuggles back, wiggling his bottom against Steve’s front. “Nope. But you liked it, right? It’s been so long. I just wanted to surprise you,” he says in an impossibly small voice that damn near breaks Steve’s heart.

“Yeah, baby doll, I liked it,” Steve presses a kiss to Bucky’s neck before he continues, “But I would’ve loved being awake to fully enjoy being with you.”   He can feel himself start to blush, but he keeps talking anyway. “You were always fantastic at riding my cock. Would’ve loved to see such a pretty hole, stretched open around me again. I didn’t get to enjoy all the sweet little noises coming out of your mouth or push the come that dribbled out when I pulled out back inside of you or –“

Bucky Barnes has had enough talk, so he grinds, hard, against Steve’s hardening dick and boy, does that shut him up. Sort of. He gasps. “You’re awake now, are you not?” Bucky asks smugly.

Two can play that game.

Steve presses two fingers against the slick, messy rim of his best friend/hopefully-new-boyfriend’s hole and whispers, “Yes, sweetheart, you’re damn right I’m awake.”

Bucky can’t help but to press back against Steve’s fingers, trying to fuck himself open again. Steve gives him one without adding more lube and it is definitely not enough to quench his needs. “Hand me the little bottle on the night stand?” Steve asks. Bucky practically whacks Steve in the face with it. Bucky’s lack of patience makes Steve chuckle.

The chuckle tickles Bucky’s ear and before Steve knows it, he’s being pushed on his back. Bucky is straddling him and fucking himself open with his metal fingers.

Oh my god. Steve has a revelation.

His (wet) dream is about to come true. And he gets to participate.

Steve reaches out to touch the gorgeous body in front of him, gliding his hands down that fantastically built chest to Bucky’s trim waist, settling on smooth, beautiful hips. He can’t help but to sigh. “Jesus Christ, you’re beautiful.”

Bucky meets his eyes, faced flushed and smirking, “Name’s Bucky, but I guess I can see how you’d make that mistake.” He pulls his fingers out while Steve’s focused on his face and sits on that wonderful, wonderful cock, sinking all the way down in one go.

Holy fuck. It’s more than either of them can handle and neither one of them can give the other shit because both men lose their breath for a second.

Steve exhales first and bends his knees so he can fuck upwards into the incredibly tight, fantastically hot ass of the only man he has ever wanted. Bucky’s dick bounces and slides against his stomach, creating a puddle of pre-cum against his abdominals. The glide gets smoother and smoother and everything is just amazing.

Steve doesn’t know if it’s been fifty seconds or fifteen minutes, but by the time all of his senses come back to him again, his torso is covered in physical evidence of Bucky’s orgasm. He is still inside of Bucky, who is panting and flushed. His “evidence” is beginning to leak out as Bucky’s rim flutters around the base of his cock.

“Goddamnit, Rogers,” Bucky huffs. “I really should have woken you up.”

They start to laugh and slowly make their way to the shower. After a very long, perfect shower, while they’re pulling clean clothes on, Steve wonders, “Did you know I had been dreaming of you the night before?”

Bucky grins. “I may have whispered a little bit in your ear before you woke up. Got everybody else to keep it from you.”

“You little shit.” Steve grins back.

Both of their stomachs grumble.

“Breakfast time,” Bucky declares.

Much to their surprise, a meal of scrambled eggs, bacon, sausage, toast, pancakes, coffee and fruit for two is already on the dining table of the floor Steve’s room is on. Piping hot, too.

They eat, in silence, grinning like idiots. When they finish, Bucky does the dishes while Steve keeps grinning like an idiot at the chair Bucky had been sitting in. Bucky does not fail to notice this, but he doesn’t point it out. Instead, he walks to the right side of Steve (although, let it be known that there are no wrong sides of Steve) and offers his left arm.

“May I interest you in accompanying me to the living room for a bit of relaxation?” Bucky asks.

Steve feigns being scandalized. “Are you trying to get me to Netflix and chill, baby doll?”

“I might just be,” Bucky winks.

Steve’s brain does not short circuit.

Steve accepts the offer.

Thor, Natasha, Bruce, and Clint join them shortly after they discover Family Guy. Tony wakes up at noon to find Thor flipping through the Children and Family section.

“Fuck you all,” he mumbles, shortly before joining them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thanks for reading!

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading.


End file.
